**I somehow couldn’t find a picture when I was 15, so I will use this one from my kindergarten years instead.
I have seen this topic – A Letter to My Younger Self – over the years on others’ blog posts and on YouTube. I think it would be quite nice for me to do one as well. I somehow want to keep this blog place a bit more sentimental, a bit more intimate and a bit more inspiring while I still do products review from time to time. Forgive me writing these sassy blog posts in English, it always flows so much better for me and I seem to be more eloquent when I write in English.
Dear Jess,
I know you are at your unhappy place and I know you are angry with the world, but hold tight and listen, I am you but a lot older, so with the knowledge and experience that I have today, I think I am more than capable to give you some life advice.
Don’t be angry with your parents
I know Mom and Dad have split up, and I know that you feel like your world is falling apart. Mom talked to you and asked you to focus on being a kid while you think you are part of the family and you should be voicing your opinion. Yes, you feel helpless and you are at a loss. The family that you once knew wasn’t quite the same anymore. Hey, but mom was right, enjoy your life, focus on being young and care-free, have fun before you hit the real world. A love relationship is not for you and me to decide whether it should continue or not. It’s between Mom and Dad. You are their daughter and you should be supportive of their decision. When you grow up, you will fall in love and you will experience break ups too. Then you will understand maintaining a relationship is a 50:50 effort, if one of the person doesn’t want to continue; it can’t go on, it simply can’t. I am sure the heart-ache that they are going through themselves is hard enough while they have to act normal in front of you, please, at least appreciate that and be supportive, do not let them worry about you as well. All I can tell you is that they are still in contact after so many years, they still care for each other as great friends. You never lose your Mom nor your Dad. Don’t worry, they are always there for you when you need them. Now, go – smile some more and put your anger aside.
Don’t be a grasshopper brain
You don’t have the patience for anything for more than 3 minutes. You seem to hop on one project and toss it after toying with it for a short amount of time. And then, you are onto your next great thought. You want to see results within a short amount of time and that’s why when you don’t see it, you are jumping to your next grand thing. Please be aware of that and change that. I am so much better at patience now, but it takes me so long to realise it and change it. That’s why I am telling you. Everything takes time, life is not instant noodle. If you want to be good at something, you need at least 10,000 hours of practice. It just won’t happen overnight. If you want something, you need to work hard (and smart) for it. There is simply no magic recipe. Pick something that you love and stick with it. Only by doing so, you will see results.
Don’t fit in
Yea, your skin colour is a bit different, and you don’t fit into the norm of beauty in Hong Kong. Don’t worry about it. Everyone is beautiful in his/her way, and who should be there to judge who’s beautiful and who’s not? Who is the ultimate person who tells us what is the beauty standard and why are we confining us in other people’s standards of beauty anyway? The world is going to be more about individuality and embracing differences within humanity. So don’t worry and don’t fit in. Don’t even try to fit in. It will frustrate you and you will lose yourself. Focus on your personality, focus on what you are good at and focus on being yourself. You are limited edition. Don’t try to be everyone else, it’s a pure waste of time. Now I can confidently tell you, people will appreciate how different and genuine you are when you are yourself.
Carry on dreaming, and dream big
When you are in your 20s, you will find yourself getting numb with life. You are a dreamer now but somehow you will loose it when you get older (not wiser) because you think “this is it, this is life…” No I can tell you, this is NOT IT! You will get to your dream but there is a detour. From the detour, you will learn a few life lessons, you will learn a few soft skills, you will be a more well-versed person. Then your dream will come true. You need to learn all that to get to where you want to be and the detour helps to shape you into a more calm and collected person that I am today. Please don’t think you should give up your dream, please don’t think that the detour is a waste of time, and please just enjoy every chapter of your life knowing that you have lessons to learn before you can bring your dream into reality.
Keep the fascination on beauty going
When you are 16, Mom will buy you the first lipstick (Makeup Forever Nude colour). You will be fascinated by the power of beauty products. Keep that passion going no matter in what stage of your life. That passion will turn into something amazing after 10 plus years. It will happen at the most unexpected time, it will be breath-taking and it will totally take you by surprise. It’s also very rewarding! I am not going to tell you what it is now, because if I told you everything, then you will probably waste your time just sitting there and not doing anything thinking that it will just happen. No, there is a lot of hard work involved, there are many sleepless nights, there are many challenges you need to overcome, and the sun doesn’t always shine on your side. But I can tell you, it’s all worth it, it’s very satisfying and it’s amazing. You will be working on something that’s even bigger than your dream right now. Trust me, I have been there. Be passionate and be fascinated in the topic of beauty.
Believe in yourself
I know there are times that you doubt yourself if you are good enough or if you can do certain thing. Just believe in yourself for god’s sake and action! You have a brain; use it, I know you can do anything if you put your soul and energy into it. Trust yourself, trust your brain and trust that you have the ability to crack anything. Sometimes you give up too soon because you feel like you are not good enough. But who told you that? You are your worst enemy! You constantly criticise yourself and hide in the excuse of “I am not good enough”. No you are good enough, you just need to engage your brain harder, put in a bit more effort and believe in yourself a lot more. I know this society has put a lot of doubt and a lot of comparison shit in your brain and those are unhealthy thoughts! Learn to eliminate those, learn to tell yourself “I know I can do this”. Every time, you doubt yourself and want to give up, go to the mirror and tell yourself, “hell no, I can do this. I know I can.”
Hey – I hope I don’t overwhelm you in any sense. These are the most important advice from me to you. Everything happens in your life is a valuable life lesson – be it good or bad. One day in your life, you will ask yourself “how many pieces of bad news a single person can take within a day?” You will know it’s THE day if you find yourself asking this question when you are riding the MTR from Heng Fa Chuen to Chai Wan. Be sure to look up, stare at the sky and tell yourself “everything is going to be OK, there are just some hidden lessons I need to learn with every page of my life. I will do just fine.”
Lots of love,
Your future self
